Why Me?


Why me? Why is it me?
I have asked this question several times, throughout my life.
After all those humiliations,
When my heart cried aloud,
I looked up and said, “Why is it me?”
After all those setbacks, my ego was bruised,
I had lost my faith in everything,
And I believed I was good for nothing!
When success seemed so sweet, but was way out of my reach!
No matter how hard I tried, it always slipped!
Everybody said, “Hard luck!”, I said, “How could it be?”
And I screamed, “Why me? Why me?”

When my friends started avoiding me,
And I couldn’t confide in anybody.
There was no one to console me,
And I was very lonely, I said, “Why me?”
When I longed for something, but I didn’t get it,
When there were jubilations but I had to miss it!
When everyone seemed to sail so smooth, and I had to fight,
When everyone fell asleep, and I was awake all the night!
And all those nights seemed so long,
When almost everything went wrong!
It was all dark, there was nothing I could see,
I asked in the fury, “Why me? Why me?”
I asked, “Why everybody is running & I am crawling?”
I asked, “Why everybody is smiling & I am howling?”
I was very sad and depressed; I had almost lost the fight,
And then came an angel with eternal light.
She held a beautiful rose in her hand,
I wondered, if she’d help me understand.
She asked, “Did you ask, ‘Why me?'”
I said, “Of course, I did!
And would you please enlighten me?
I am totally destroyed, can’t you see?”

She just smiled, and said gently,
“All your questions will be answered; listen carefully,
If it’s not you, who should it be?
Everybody suffers, oh dear, can’t you see?
It is just that when you cry for your pain loudly,
You ignore others pain knowingly, unknowingly!”
“But why me? Let it be anyone!”
“It’s everyone, you are not alone!”
“But I have suffered a lot!”, I was stubborn.
“Certainly not, everything had its own reason!”
“What about humiliations? Doesn’t it matter?”
“It was an experience to teach you better!”
“But why my intelligence was not rewarded with success?
Why my friendship was not responded with affection?
Why my performance was not rewarded with achievements?
Why I am always the one who has to accept disappointments?”
She said, “Oh dear, why do you think you’ll always get what you want?
Life is different from your dreams; you must strive for what you want!
If you want to be different, if your dreams are big,
You must try harder for the same.
And all those setbacks are part of the game!
Your loss is immaterial; your growth didn’t stop.
Just believe in yourself, and you’ll reach the top!
Oh dear, courage is wonderful, never surrender to pain,
Never say die, you must try again!
And you can’t always have someone to console you, that’s impossible!
It’s your life after all; you must fight your own battles!
If you refuse to accept facts in life, it would be difficult to live,
Dear, sometimes you must forget, sometimes you must forgive!
Learn to accept the facts; you must grow up,
Things will change for better, never give up!
Remember, there’s always the next time, there’s always tomorrow,
And tomorrow may be even brighter than today!
In the abyss of darkness, there’s always a ray of hope,
The morrow will be yours, cheer up!”

I kept mum; I had nothing else to say,
I was lost; she brought me back on my way!
I woke up and found a rose on my pillow,
I held it in my hand, and I was never the same!
Now when my silly heart grumbles, “Why me?”,
I pacify, “Let it be, let it be!”
I believe, one day I’ll make it,
Someday, all my dreams might just come true!
Maybe, all my sorrows will not get over,
But I promise, I’ll be smiling, now and forever.
So for the time being, if it’s me,
I’ll say, “Let it be, let it be!”

© Manish Hatwalne
(Originally written on : 25 March 1996)

Published earlier on boloji.com

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